Monthly Archives: January 2010

burnt biscuits.

Many thanks to my wonderful sister for sending this to me. A, your timing was perfect, and you, too, have touched my life in many more ways than you’ll ever know and could ever imagine. I love you!

And now, I share with you the forward A sent to me on a gray day in January, “Burnt Biscuits.”

When I was a kid, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.

On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school.

I don’t remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that biscuit and eat every bite!

When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits. And I’ll never forget what he said, “Honey, I love burned biscuits.”

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned.

He wrapped me in his arms and said, “Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she’s real tired. And besides – a little burnt biscuit never hurt anyone!” You know, life is full of imperfect things … and imperfect people. I’m not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and anniversaries just like everyone else. What I’ve learned over the years is that learning to accept each others faults – and choosing to celebrate each others differences – is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

And that’s my prayer for you today. That you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and lay them at the feet of God. Because in the end, He’s the only One who will be able to give you a relationship where a burnt biscuit isn’t a deal-breaker!

We could extend this to any relationship. In fact, understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship! Don’t put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket – keep it in your own.

God bless you … now and always. So please pass me a biscuit, and yes, the burnt one will do just fine!

Please pass this along to someone who has enriched your life … I just did!

one word: explore.

Remember this? Well I’ve figured out just what my one word for 2010 will be.

Explore.

That’s it.

Explore.

Think about it for a moment.

Explore.

Yes, for me, 2010 is about exploring. It’s about looking at who I am and who I want to be. This year is about figuring out the details, and working through how I can make those details best work in my situation.

(Heavens knows it hasn’t been easy so far … but it has been enlightening.)

It’s about cleaning out what doesn’t belong and inviting in what does.

So how exactly does one explore? That’s what I’m figuring out now – now that I have my word.

Explore.

If you’ve read posts from the past few days, you already know that I’ve been exploring one particularly unflattering trait that I’m so good at – jealousy. As with any exploration, it isn’t easy, and change won’t happen overnight. No problem; I’m game.

Another thing I want to explore is time management. I thought I had a pretty good system pre-Peanut … but things are totally different now. The balance between work, Lily-time (Which is my #1 priority and desire!), chores, family/friends, and me-time is so, so, so difficult. I’m hoping to find a happy medium this year.

I have a few other things on my list, but I don’t want to leave you hanging later on. Instead, I’ll keep you updated on my quest – I’ll share the ups and downs.

Explore.

It’s going to be a great year!

standing.

Yep, it’s true.

Our baby girl is standing!

I was looking for something upstairs last night, so I took Lily up with me and put her in her crib with some toys – she could play, I could look – all was right.

Until I looked over and she was …

standing!

I watched her do it half a dozen or so more times last night – she used the round rail on the very top/front of her crib to pull herself up and stay upright.

I’ll get pictures this weekend; I was in total shock and didn’t even think to grab the camera last night.

Standing. She’s standing.

Sheesh …

big girl.

I did it. I clicked, “Proceed to Checkout,” and then continued on and clicked, “Place your order.” Oh my.

Oh. My.

Here’s what happened …

Last Friday afternoon I picked Lily up, loaded her in the car, and we were on our way home. Before we could even get to the top of the street, I hear her car seat thrashing around in the back seat. Yes, she was making it bounce up and down by pushing on the back of the seat with her feet. Not good.

I immediately called my mom, who broke the news to me:  it’s time for a big girl car seat. Oh heavens, I wasn’t prepared for this.

You see, I was under the impression that our little girl would be in her infant car seat until she was 1. Yeah, I win the mom of the year award for not knowing that she goes in a convertible car seat – facing backwards, still – as soon as she’s outgrown the infant car seat. Not at age 1. Uh huh, no gold star for me. I’m an idiot, I guess.

Anyway, I did some research this week, checked out various brands and models, and made my decision. And once the decision was made last night, I placed my order … and it was not easy.

Our little girl isn’t so little anymore. I know it’s a funny time to get one of those feelings, – I mean, over a car seat, for Pete’s sake (Who’s Pete, anyway?) – but it happened. She’s sitting in the cart at the grocery store and eating from a high chair at restaurants. She feeds herself and drinks from a cup without help.

Um, what happened to my baby?

Yes, I know … she’s still a baby. But in a way, she’s not. Yes, she’s still highly dependent on us, but she’s also gaining more and more of her independence every day. I love to watch her learn and grow, but at the same time, it’s rather bittersweet. It’s happy, and it’s sad.

The new car seats are slated to arrive on Monday, and that will likely be another heartbreaking evening as I swap out the bases in both cars for real, no turning back, big girl car seats. Until that moment comes, I’m savoring every minute of her in the infant car seat. I know it’s silly, but I’m hanging on to this thread until the very end.

And the end is very, very near …

lately.

She loves the wheels on things …

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… and loves hanging out with Cody! (Cody, on the other hand, isn’t so crazy about the hair pulling, tail yanking, foot scratching that goes on when they’re together!)

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At the chaotic train show …

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… and eating, which she’s doing so well with now!

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That’s what we’ve been up to – how about you?

yum.

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addiction.

I have a confession to make. I’m addicted to …
I’m addicted to …
to …
okay, I’m addicted to these!!!

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See them there! It’s January 27th, and I’ve had my first Cadbury Egg sighting!
Yippee!

IMG00224e1 Oh.
My.
Heavens.

Now, the tradition goes like this. The first time I see them each year, I buy 3. So guess what!? I have 3 Cadbury Eggs in my possession, and I can’t wait to taste the first one!

I don’t know what it is about these overly-sweet, calorie-laden eggs that gets me every year, but it’s my indulgence. It’s because of these eggs that I cannot give up chocolate for Lent. I’m serious.

Please tell me you’ve got a similar ridiculous indulgence?
Please!?

just wait. be patient.

They say that good things come to those who wait,
but I’m not convinced.
Seems lately that good things are being blessed upon people
who aren’t waiting;
those who aren’t
asking
for these things.
Those who don’t need them.
(Well, that’s my perspective. It’s not good to assume, so I take it back. Okay?)

The unfortunate part is that I’m not patient.
I’m waiting for a few of the very same blessings
that have recently been unexpectedly bestowed upon
friends and family members, and that’s just the problem …
I’m still waiting.

One of these things is
absolutely eating me alive right now,
and though I’m trying my absolute best to remain positive,
I’m finding myself
increasingly
bitter.
I know,
not a flattering quality -
at all.

I’m trying.
Really,
I am.

The worst of it is that
he knows it upsets me,
yet he continues to make it worse.

Thanks.
I’ll be sure to return the favor.
Okay, I take that back.
That wouldn’t be nice, right?

Yep, he talks about it
and talks around my thoughts.
Ehem, as always.
I’m probably better off talking to
a
daggone
cardboard
box
.
Or maybe the dog.
Then there are no expectations.
Truth is, though,
I’m somewhat used to it,
and I knew it would never change.

Shame on me for expecting something different.

I know what you’ll say.
You’ll tell me to get over it.
You’ll say, “Be patient.”
You’ll fill me in on the fact that jealousy is not,
in any
way,
shape or
form,
a good quality.

I know.
I’m trying …
I promise.
It’s just not easy.
Not easy at all when it’s something I’ve wanted,
no, needed,
for
so l-o-n-g.

introspective: failure & jealousy.

It seems that in just about everything I do, I don’t succeed. I was just thinking, though – is the problem in my determination, or in my definition of success? I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve started something and not completed it; tried something, failed and given up. It’s depressing, really.

Lately, those trials and subsequent failures or in-completions have been wearing on me. No one said this introspection thing was easy, eh? I’m so frustrated, and as my moments to myself become more and more precious, the frustration only intensifies.

I see those around me celebrating their successes; their new beginnings or happy endings. But considering the topic at hand, I can’t jump to conclusions. Instead, I have to think deeper. Do those people feel that they’ve completed their quest? Have they followed through and reached the end in their mind? Can they define their new beginning or happy ending as successful, or have they failed? I can’t assume they’re happy; I can’t assume they’re done.

And what do my failures – as I call them – look like in the eyes of others? What’s incomplete in my mind might represent a huge finish to someone else, right? Something I think of as simple may be huge to a friend or family member. I need to remember that.

I guess the point is that we’re all different. We all see things just slightly differently based on so many factors – what we know, our experiences, and our values, among others.

I’ve been taking time lately to think through things and not over-react. Remember, this is my year, and I won’t let my jealousy creep in as a result of all of this positive change going on around me – at least not too much. It’s one of my biggest faults – one of which I am guilty all. the. time.

I guess jealousy is like any other bad habit – smoking, drinking, over-spending, over-eating, etc. They’re all so hard to break; so difficult to give up. But with patience and determination, most of those bad habits can be overcome.

So, will this mission of mine to ditch jealousy be a success or a failure in the end? Can I be happy for those who are celebrating and succeeding and not give it a second thought or think, “What about me?” And even better, can I celebrate my own successes – even if they’re so small in my mind – and avoid deeming everything I do a failure?

Only time will tell, I guess. At this point, I’m trying my best and taking things one day at a time. Really, that’s all I’ve got to give.

What about you? Is there anything you’re hanging on to and want to get rid of in 2010? What improvements are you working on or what might you want to face head on this year? Do you have external motivators, or is it something you’re doing for yourself? If you’re on a similar quest, believe me – I’m cheering you on!

chaos.

It seems that anything that matters in our lives always comes with chaos. Today is a hugely exciting day for my husband; a great start with a fantastic organization. He leaves behind another great job, but this one has far more advantages than what his previous employer could provide.

So why, on the day that he starts his new job, does the power go out twice, does the rain fall from the sky, and do my brakes decide to act crazy, causing us to waste precious time in his morning routine? I tell you, it never fails. Oh, and did I mention the traffic? Three accidents on my way in, which is also his new way in! Ridiculous. It’s rain, people, and it happens to be 58 degrees … seriously.

All in all, he made it on time and without any snags, Lily is right where she should be, and we’re all well. We have little to complain about, really. It is just comical, though!

In Lily news, she’s got “Da da da da da!” perfectly. She’s also pulling up on what seems like just about everything, so I’ve been working with her like crazy to stand flat on her feet. I guess it will come with time, but she’s standing on her toes, so I’m trying to work on that.

Other than new discoveries with Lily, the weekend was rather uneventful. Seems I cooked all day yesterday between household chores, and it was actually lots of fun! I started out by baking a chicken so Justin would have lunch for this week. After that, I started applesauce in my mini-crock pot for Lily. Yum! For lunch, I made quesadillas that were out of this world, and I wrapped up the evening with a pork roast in the oven. That daggone roast made me realize just how much I love my crock pot – the 4.5 lb roast took just under 4 hours to cook in the oven!

Enough about us … what have you been up to?

Have a great week!